“This is Me! So What?”

5 Qualities of Women Who Don’t Give a ****

“She is not pretty. Don’t be fooled by her fair skin.”

“Do you really think you are that smart?”

“You could have been more attractive if not for your flat nose.”

“I don’t think she can make it!”

How many times do we have to get hurt by listening to other people’s comments?

How many times do we have to change ourselves, just to comply with the society’s standards? Why do some thin, Barbie doll-like women still suffer from insecurity while other women who aren’t physically attractive according to what media dictates seem to be having an abundant supply of self- esteem?

What makes these women rise above from any form of criticism whether it is about their appearance, background, status, or personality? What I am about to share with you are my observations on how strong women handle negative feedback from other people.

Whether I am right or wrong, I do believe that if we possess certain mindsets and execute them into actions, we can always end up as winners, regardless of what the society believes we should look or act.

First is that, these strong women focus on their strengths. Each of us is given a unique talent. For example, some may have natural talent in the visual arts, while some can reach up soprano without hurting our eardrums. It is as if they are given two doors to enter into. This first door leads to self-doubt, discouragement, and despair. The second door leads to creativity, achievement, and productivity. These people seem to automatically enter the second door. There could be a number of factors. It could have been through their parents’ influence, and the over-all environment they live in.

It could be that they simply mirrored some family members who are also achievers themselves. Whatever the cause is, these women know what they are capable of and focus on it.

Second is that they surround themselves with friends who appreciate them over those who always emphasize their weaknesses. These women spend time with people who they are comfortable with, knowing for a fact that no matter what they wear, or no matter how physically unappealing they may feel, there will always be those friends who will see beyond what is outside.When they are together, they seldom gossip about other women. Their topics would be about funny stories, a recollection of the past, politics, or simply life in general.

Their friendship is deeply bound by pleasant experiences, not because  of “You-are –pretty- and –I- am- pretty- let- us- then -be –friends- with- each- other” type.

Third, they are aware that their personality and not their appearance is what matters. “I will stand tall no matter what!”

They know that they can exude charisma even if their physical attributes are not what society thinks is “beautiful”. They feel staggeringly exquisite from the inside.

Why will they waste their energy judging themselves? They believe in their capacity to interact, to stand out from the crowd.

They have this certain security and belief in themselves, that once people get to know who they truly are, they will simply be liked and admired. It is not based on false beliefs though, because they have stabilized a set of qualities that are ready to be shared to others at any given time.

The fourth action (or inaction) that they execute is that they do not compare themselves with other people.

They are aware that comparing themselves with other women will just consume their energy and suck out dry the happiness in them. Some women will be smarter, taller, and overall more charming than they are. They accept that fact, but they do not let it burn down their self-confidence.

Some women may have enviable physical looks, but cannot seem to escape the comparison game.

Can I be honest here? When I was younger, I was guilty of doing this a LOT of time. Do you want to know the outcome? Nothing much! I simply just hated myself, spiraling down into becoming an extremely insecure teenager.

It took me years of slow transformation into loving myself. I am glad to be out of that trap. How did I escape? Well, I guess it takes time, patience, experience, constant self- reflection, and the desire to change. Everything is possible, if you are willing to exert the effort.

Last but not the least, these women who have high regard of themselves. They have thick skin. Do not get me wrong here. They just seem to develop the attitude of not giving a damn on people who waste their time finding what is wrong in them.

They ignore them, or engage in activities that make them valuable members in their community, and the world in general. Being too sensitive with other people’s opinions can kill one’s joy in life. It depletes one’s personal power.

Those who thrive do not let other people’s words destroy them. Instead, they use hurtful words as energy reserves, to catapult them into becoming outstanding individuals. Try to bring them down? They will simply prove you wrong.

There you have it guys. I may have missed out other qualities that women of high self-esteem have. Maybe I would add some more in my future posts.

So far right now, I speak from the heart. What I wrote above are based on what I have concluded along these years thru observation from peers and media personalities.

Stories and advice from different game-changers in our society in the past and the present having also inspired in so many ways.

Although it may appear that I am only pertaining to women in this post, I also think that this post can resonate with anyone who is feeling discouraged or dealing with self-doubt, whatever the gender is. 😊

Remember, each of us is bestowed upon with special talents and qualities.

Your job is to find what it is!

Happy searching!


Minette 😊


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